Friday 10th December
We arrived at school at 11am and squeezed into the car. I sat next to
Tom because he had his i-pod. On the way we picked up Matt. It suddenly
felt very claustrophobic, which is weird because Matt can hardly be described
as massive. After a while we were really bored. Nathan came to the rescue
with his phone. It had a really cool bowling game on it. We took it in
turns to try to get the highest score. Nathan won with 147, although it
was a bit unfair since it was his phone. This made the journey seem much
quicker and in no time we had arrived at the services in Cambridge. We
had some lunch and then decided to go to the shop. Since I promised the
team I would tie my hair back, I looked for some hair-bands. Obviously
they had to be pink because I have to stay in touch with my feminine side.
I found 12 hair-bands for £0.99 and I also let Matt and Nathan help
me choose what to put in my pick 'n mix bag. This proved a very costly
mistake and the total price of the hair-bands and sweets was about £2.50.
I had just paid £1.50 for about 2 sweets. Just before we left the
shop, we decided to look at the magazines. Tony found his favourite- "The
Gay Times." Tom has a rather amusing picture of Tony reading it.
As a last desperate attempt to spend money, we went in the arcade/games
place and tried to win a Fimble (because Matt wanted one) on the grab
machines. We lost and went back to the car crying.
A couple of painful hours later, we arrived at the youth hostel. It was
a very nice youth hostel, especially when compared to the flea ridden
Malham youth hostel (see big trip diary day 4). We bagsied our beds and
attempted to settle in. However we were disturbed by Mr. A with some very
worrying news- we were going shopping at…TESCO! Obviously our mental stability
was in danger of collapsing at this prospect. In the end, though it wasn't
that bad. Me and Matt got some fantastic bargains. We both bought some
pink, not gay, totally cool, fluffy slippers. They were really practical
because we can wipe our climbing shoes on them and then put our climbing
shoes inside them to stop them getting dirty. I also got 2 cans of deodorant
for £1. Unfortunately one smelt like furniture polish and the other
smelt like soap. We were tempted to buy a latex swimming cap and a white
golfing glove as well. But we didn't.
We took our shopping back and then went into the games room to play some
team pool. It was going to be me and Matt vs. Tony and Tom. However, Mr.
A had a special mission for Tony and Tom. They had to go to the shop to
buy something or other and I've forgotten what. Me and Matt decided to
play a little one-on-one. I whooped Matt's ass!
For dinner we had the most delicious meal on Earth- Kedgeree, YAY! It
was the best one ever and Tony offered to clean the pan afterwards so
that was an added bonus. I had to wash up, Tom dried and Matt put away.
Nathan didn't do anything because he helped prepare dinner. We decided
to time ourselves and we managed to complete the job in less than 10 minutes,
which, by our standards, is really quick. When we finished Nathan challenged
me to a game of pool. This time it was me whose ass was whooped! Nathan
was lucky.
We went back to our room and played poker for a while. At 9:30 we went
to Mr. A and Mrs Tony's mum's room to watch Little Britain. It was most
enjoyable and we decided to retreat to bed once it had finished.
Getting to sleep today proved very difficult because we took Nathan's
flickering light comment to new extremes. We realised we had individual
lights by our beds. We thought it was funny to turn our lights on when
all the other ones were off. Eventually this got annoying so Matt decided
to make sexy noises. This also got annoying and Matt decided to stop because
Tony threatened to punch him. Eventually we were all asleep.
Saturday 11th December
In order to be at The Leeds Wall in time for registration we had to
be up by 7:00, urrgghh! We had a really horrible cooked breakfast which
comprised of soggy cornflakes (which were actually un-cooked) cold beans,
uncooked hash browns, barely cooked bacon and a fried egg.
After our delicious breakfast we set off in the vague direction of Leeds.
It didn't take long and was nowhere near as uncomfortable as the journey
from Thanet. Our first impressions were that it wasn't as exciting as
it used to be because it was no longer bright yellow on the outside-
very disappointed. On the way up Matt had been talking about where he
would be climbing. As usual he expected to be climbing first, if not
second. His assumptions were correct and he was indeed second to climb.
We walked into the main leading area, having registered, and, to our
surprise, did not wet ourselves. The wall was nowhere near as scary
as everyone had said it was, it was just sooo steep!
The first route looked pretty straight forward. It was a relatively
easy climb with an interesting top section that actually looked harder
for tall people, much to mine and Matt's satisfaction. After someone
had done the route (can't remember who) Matt stepped up in his slippers.
In no time at all he was at the top, having done a cool dyno to get
there. He was very pleased because that was the first ever climb that
he had topped in the BICCs. He told us that the climb wasn't too bad
and soon Nathan, Tony and me had all topped it as well. Tom also did
well on his first route. He had a really tough route up the middle of
the main wall. After a strong effort he fell off a couple of moves from
the top.
We decided to do a bit of bouldering to pass time while we waited for
the demos of the second qualifiers to start. During this time we found
out that a total of 13 people had topped the first qualifier. The pressure
was now on to do well on route 2. For us, this turned out to be the
senior male route 1 with a few tweaks. Tom had a nasty climb on the
left side of the wall. It had about a billion volumes in it and it looked
impossible.
This time it was Tony who had to climb second. He did very well and
fell off a couple of moves below Tomo's high point. I also got to the
same place and Nathan fell off just one move lower down, hitting his
belayer on the head as he fell. Matt found it a bit harder and he fell
off on a tricky section a bit lower down.
Meanwhile, over on the men's route, Tom was also finding things a bit
difficult. He fell off quite low down but he gave it all he could. I
think we were all impressed with Tom's efforts in the BICCs this year,
he did really well.
Me and Tony were both quite confident of getting into the final and
we weren't disappointed. What we didn't expect though, was to be joined
by No Fear Nathan himself. In round 1 there was 1 member of the Margate
Massive in the final, in round 2 there were 2 and now there were 3.
A third of all the finalists were Dane Court pupils.
Isolation was particularly boring today because we had to wait 1 and
a half hours for the routes to be changed. The highlight of the time
we spent in isolation was when Percy Bishton gave Gaz Parry an atomic
wedgie, ripping his underwear in the process (and the senior men are
supposed to be the mature ones).
A short while later we were finally allowed to go out for observation.
We had a really rubbish looking climb which was tucked away to one side.
The girls had a really long and impressive looking route, as did the
senior men and women. Obviously the junior males are so good they don't
need an impressive route to look good.
Eventually the girls were called out and soon it was the turn of the
boys. First out from the Margate Massive was Nathan. I forgot to listen
for how well he did so I didn't know. Next up was Tony. Judging by the
claps, I decided he had got the furthest so far. I was fifth out. The
walk to the climb seemed to take ages and all I heard on the way was
Matt shouting "pink slippers, £2 from Tesco." A few
hours later I reached the climb and had one last look at the rote. I
stepped of the ground and all went well until the bit with the big triangular
volume things. A move which had looked easy during observation was actually
quite hard and I hit my head on something whilst doing it. This didn't
put me off and I was so focused that I climbed right past a hold I was
supposed to clip from. I knew I couldn't clip the quick draw so I had
to fall off. Stupidly I didn't jump to slap the next hold. When I reached
the ground I found out that Nathan had done exactly what I had done
but he had slapped the next hold. Nathan had beaten me.
I went and joined Matt and Nathan and settled down to watch the rest
of the final. I nearly had a heart attack, however, when Rob Mackenzie
fell off really low down. Ironically I told him in isolation that I
was going to beat him. This was a massive disappointment because he
really deserved to win; he's such a nice guy. As it happened, Tyler
won. In the senior males a very similar thing happened. Steve McClure
fell off low down and first place was taken by so called boulderer,
Gaz Parry, minus his underwear. Unsurprisingly, Lucy Creamer won the
senior females. In the junior female category, victory was taken by
Hazel Findlay, while series winner, Nat Berry, only managed to finish
fourth.
We finished our stay at The Leeds Wall by constantly taking pictures
of Beth, much to her annoyance. Matt said goodbye to his new found love
and we departed from the venue. On the way back we stopped off at a
really nice restaurant called "Fox and Grapes" (I think).
I thought this was a really strange name. I've heard of Fox and Hounds
and the two names go together well. However, I have never heard of a
fox being chased by grapes. Nevertheless, it was a really good restaurant.
I had a gammon steak. It tasted totally different to any gammon I have
ever had before, it was better. Everybody else said they thoroughly
enjoyed their meals too.
When we got back to the hostel we had a quick game of poker and then
went to bed. It was, once again, quite difficult to get to sleep. We
decided to emphasise on one of Kempy's bad habits again. This time it
was the art of making loud noises with his derrière. We decided
to imitate this habit. After a while it got a bit smelly (thanks Matt)
so we decided to go to sleep.
Sunday 12th December
Today we had to wake up nice and early again (ohhh) because we were
going bouldering at Almscliff. We went down to breakfast and I had decided
I was going to have a croissant because the cooked breakfast wasn't
very nice. The mean people who were serving said I couldn't because
I wasn't having a continental breakfast! They gave Mrs Tony's mum a
croissant though. In the end I only had a yoghurt and some cornflakes.
30 minutes later we were on our way to Armscliff. I sat in the back
with Matt and he was constantly texting Beth. It was really boring for
me. However, it didn't take long to get there. It was really cold, colder
than the Westway or Ratho, but, despite this, we were soon setting up
our stuff under our first climb, a V0. It was alright for a warm up
but I'd hardly call it a classic. Just round the corner, however, was
a classic, the fantastic Matterhorn Arête. Me and Matt bouldered
the first few moves but then we got a bit high, resulting in us almost
wetting ourselves. We decided to wait until we had a boulder matt. We
went back round the corner and found the other guys trying a little
V2. It looked quite good so we decided to join in. After everybody had
done it, most flashing it, we moved on. We stopped at a scary looking
roof and I can't remember what it is called, though it is a classic.
There was a little V0 which we all decided to do. Matt and Nathan both
flashed it and then it was my turn. I stuck my hand in a crack then
tried to move it. It didn't come out and it bent the wrong way. Something
clicked really loudly and I fell off. My finger hurt so much and a few
hours later it was quite swollen, possibly broken. I subsequently finished
the V0, as did Tomo and Tony. Whilst us not so good guys went on to
a V4 traverse, Tom decided to do a well-ard V7 roof thingy. It involved
lots of slaps on non-existent holds. He did eventually do it though,
which is more than can be said about the rest of us. Although Tony flashed
the V4 the rest of us didn't. I had an excuse, my finger. Matt and Nathan
didn't have any excuses though.
Tony was really good today. After doing the V4, he then went on to do
the V7 that Tom did and also a V6. Well done to him. I think Matt also
did a V5 variation to crucifix as well. Nathan might have done it too.
I can't remember because my broken finger (which turned out not to be
broken) gave me temporary memory loss. Obviously I would have done V10
if I was capable of climbing!
After having a spot of luncheon, and doing a little more hardcore bouldering,
we set off home. I was in the back with Matt again. This time he went
to sleep. He is soooo boring. I was looking forward to some good company;
all I got was the sound of him snoring.
The journey home was relatively uneventful. That is until we got to
the Cambridge services. As our shoes were covered in mud and cow poo,
me and Matt decided to wear our cool slippers. People kept looking at
us as if we were gay. Once again we went to the shop. This time I decided
not to let anyone help me buy sweets. I managed to pay less than £1
for them that way. We also went in the arcadey/game place again. We
failed to win a Fimble this time too. Matt almost cried!
On the last bit of the journey, I finally beat Nathan on bowling. I
scored 150 points. Yay! We arrived home some time in the evening with
chronic leg cramps due to lack of space. It was well worth it though.
Well done to everybody who entered the BICCs. It was a really enjoyable
comp and it was probably Dane Court's best round yet…3 members of the
Margate Massive in the final. I hope to see more males wearing pink
slippers from now on. Peace out!
Callum Harris
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